


Going Home

by anotherbuskitten



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-18
Updated: 2014-03-18
Packaged: 2018-01-16 03:44:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1330696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anotherbuskitten/pseuds/anotherbuskitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Death could never have parted them. Nothing could ever have stopped Bucky from following Steve.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Going Home

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [归途](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1983600) by [hamLock](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hamLock/pseuds/hamLock)



Bucky falls and it is slower than he thought it would be and he falls until he cannot see Steve’s face anymore and his breath is all sucked out of him and –

And there is a second, when he hits the ice, where he feels he could still be alive.

///

Bucky opens his eyes. He’s pretty sure this isn’t heaven or hell, but whatever, maybe God’s a Nazi. Steve would hate him saying that – oh fuck, Steve. Where’s Steve?

Everything is white and wet and cold, at least he thinks it’s cold it looks like snow so – oh.

He tries to poke the dead body – _his_ dead body – in front of him but his hand goes straight through. Huh.

Later, after testing his ghost powers, Bucky realises that if he was a ghost that hadn’t passed on that meant he had unfinished business and that could only mean Steve. After all his purpose had always been to keep Steve safe.

He pictures his friend’s face and flies off.

(He also realises that he will definitely go to hell for his thought about God now. But first, Steve.)

///

It takes longer than he’d like to reach Steve so when he reaches him he is on a rapidly falling plane and he’s saying goodbye and all Bucky can do is scream at him to get out, to at least try to escape this but Steve can’t hear him and Steve can’t see him and Steve is drowning and Bucky is crying and screaming and then –

And then Steve’s body is freezing over and all Bucky can do is stay with him and wait to pass over.

Bucky does not pass over. Nor does Steve join him in ghost form. Sometimes, in the quiet of the ice water Bucky pretends he can hear Steve’s heartbeat still going.

Eventually he leaves, not before promising he will come back, to check on the rest of the commandoes. Miraculously they are all still living and fighting and because of this he stays with them until, until a few months later the war is over and they are all still alive and the world is not broken anymore.

He goes back to Steve.

///

But in the end Bucky has never been a saint and he can’t stay with Steve’s frozen body all the time so he goes back to America and waits for something to happen.

The war is over and in some places it shows. In others it doesn’t, in others there are still people running because of their skin, their religion, their loves. In other places there are people running from the sounds of war and the gaps it left behind.

Bucky is already an orphan so he does not have to watch his family grieve. He thinks, sometimes, that he remembers a baby sister when his parents died but he had been at the orphanage a long time and doesn’t know where to look for someone who may not even exist.

He sticks close to the commandoes and consequentially to Peggy Carter and Howard Stark. He watches Carter and Morita grow closer and cheers them on without the slightest bit of guilt towards Steve.

Steve would want them to be happy.

He starts to learn how to fly quicker and find shortcuts in the earth. He goes back to Steve every month or so.

Stark starts looking for Steve’s body; and instead he finds the plane wreck and the shiny thing the Skull had wanted so badly. There is no trace of the Skull’s body.

Stark does not give up.

Stark marries and has a son and doesn’t stop looking for Steve. Bucky starts staying with the other Starks whenever Howard is away. Howard is away a lot.

Anthony Stark is annoying and clever and far too much like his father but Bucky can’t quite bring himself to dislike him.

One day Stark and his wife are in a car accident on a slippery road and die before they can reach a hospital.

Bucky goes to the funeral and watches Anthony’s face. There are no tears and afterwards he is left in the custody of Stark’s business partner.

Bucky goes back to Steve.

///

The commandoes continue to grow and age and live and one day he comes back and they are old men.

///

There are still boats labelled ‘Stark’ looking for Steve.

///

His friends all slowly die until there is only Fallsworth left. Bucky stays by his side and tells him stories about Anthony.

When Fallsworth dies Bucky is the only one in the room and they make eye contact for less than a second before the heartbeat ceases.

///

Bucky goes back to Steve.

///

Sometimes he watches Anthony, who is an adult now, and running a company and fucking a lot of people and making weapons.

He gets a bit worried about Anthony.

///

He goes back to Steve.

///

The next time he goes to America he finds that Anthony has been kidnapped in Afghanistan and for the first time he runs towards someone other than Steve.

For the nine months Anthony spends in a cave Bucky stays with him. It is the longest he has stayed away from Steve.

It is also the first time he realises that Anthony really is a genius and really is an adult.

His eyes meet Yinsen’s when he dies.

He stays with Anthony.

///

_“I am Iron Man.”_

Bucky feels sort of ridiculously proud of him at that moment.

///

Bucky goes back to Steve.

///

And then –

And then –

And then a boat finds Steve.

///

Bucky regrets not paying more attention to SHIELD in the past few decades. He knows what they are, and what they do and he knows that Peggy had something to do with them but. That is all he knows.

They say Steve is still alive which he mostly knew even if he hadn’t ever said so.

He didn’t have anyone to say it to anyway.

SHIELD are probably idiots though, because they put Steve in a faux-40’s room that his friend will see through in seconds when he wakes up.

Bucky stays by Steve’s side and waits. Considering that he has waited for the past seventy odd years he thinks it should probably be less agonising than it is.

///

Steve wakes up and Bucky woops with joy and Steve turns and stares.

Bucky stares back.

In the background commentary to a game they had both attended drones on.

///

Steve can see Bucky but that doesn’t mean anyone else can so Steve can’t really communicate with him. This doesn’t stop Bucky talking to Steve all the time.

Luckily Steve can multitask so he can listen to Fury’s dry talks about the twenty-first century and why he can’t leave SHIELD headquarters and listen to Bucky talk about everything he’s missed at the same time.

SHIELD records everything so Steve can’t talk back to Bucky without looking insane. He almost says something anyway a couple of times but Bucky reminds him that he wants to get out of SHIELD someday.

Steve passes all his psych tests.

He still isn’t allowed outside.

Sometimes Bucky leaves and comes back with stories for Steve. It turns out that Anthony is working as a consultant for SHIELD now so he talks about him a lot.

He doesn’t tell Steve about Afghanistan in any detail because it’s private. And available to anyone who can buy a newspaper but Steve understands.

Steve gets a little frowny wrinkle when he explains about Howard and Bucky remembers that Steve actually liked the other Stark.

(“ _He never stopped looking for you though_.”)

///

“We’ve made some mistakes –

_“Oh – wow – understatement.”_

“Trying to get me back into the world?”

“Trying to save it.”

_“Don’t take that bet Steve.”_

///

_“Oooh, I’m starting to regret not paying attention to the world.”_

_“Try looking less gormless, Stevie.”_

“I mean; I was present while you were unconscious.”

_“That’s true. He was there a lot. He’s very passionate about you.”_

_“Do you think he made it stealthy?”_

“People might just need a little old-fashioned”

_“Or someone who doesn’t stick out like, like, like a guy wearing a flag. Don’t look at me like that Steve, you know it’s true.”_

///

_“Hey, I can -um- track people, kind of; you think I should check on our villains?”_

_“Right, sorry, I’ll get to that. But you know none of the information will be any help – I’m going.”_

///

_“Hey, how’s it going? They’re building something using iridium and the guy with arrows needs an eyeball. They don’t talk much and it’s all science-y; I don’t really understand much.”_

_“Wow. Snazzy; still think you could do with some stealth but maybe they’ve made it so it can turn invisible or some – shutting up now.”_

_“Don’t distract you while you’re fighting, right?”_

_“They have some great music in this time, don’t they?”_

_“Try to be nice Steve; he’s just marking his territory or something. He’s quite nice really. I think this is how he shows affection. And Howard was a dick about you.”_

“I have a plan: attack!”

_“In fairness, that was what we usually did too.”_

_“Sorry, sorry, I still like you best, don’t worry.”_

///

_“What if that hadn’t worked Steve? What if his hammer was stronger? Don’t, don’t you do that again Steve. Don’t you dare leave me here alone.”_

///

_“If it helps in the slightest; I’m just as lost as you.”_

_“Hint: just assume everyone’s hiding something.”_

_“Oh, God would I like a blueberry.”_

“We have orders, we should follow them.”

“ _Steve. You_ _complete_ hypocrite _.”_

///

_“Hell of a bargaining chip Banner’s got, huh?”_

“A higher form of war.”

_“I don’t think war changes all that much. Nothing’s really changed since our time; I doubt aliens can change that.”_

“Excuse me? Do we come to your planet and blow things up?”

_“Only because we don’t have the technology.”_

_“Steve-_

_“Steve-_

_“Don’t be cruel. Anthony - don’t –_

///

_“Hey; confession: I’d kinda forgotten what actual fighting felt like. And I hate not being able to do anything.”_

“I know Buck.”

_“Don’t answer me; we don’t need them to start doubting you as well as everything else.”_

“It’s too loud for anyone to hear anything. Stop worrying.”

_“I’m just going to – to see what everyone else is doing – make sure this thing isn’t going to fall apart. Don’t die Steve-o.”_

///

_“I don’t know what to do.”_

“We fight.”

_“I can’t Steve! I can’t do anything.”_

“Just, just stay with Loki; make sure he doesn’t have any more tricks.”

///

_“Loki’s just watching, Steve. I think from here on his plan’s just to defeat you all.”_

///

“Yeah. It’ll be fun.”

_“Oh, she’s good.”_

“Uh-huh. They’re all good.”

_“Worthy replacements, right?”_

“That’s not. Bucky you know that’s not what’s happening.”

_“Yeah, I know. I just. I don’t want to be left behind again.”_

“Buck –”

_“It’s fine, just don’t die Steve and it’ll be ok.”_

“You ever gonna tell me what happened to the others? The rest of the commandoes?”

_“They got old. Go save the world.”_

///

“Stark. You know that’s a one way trip?”

_“Wait, what? What did he say? Steve, Steve! What did he say?”_

_“No.”_

“Close it.”

_“No. Steve. No.”_

“Son-of-a-gun.”

“ROOOOAAARR!”

“We won.”

///

They are all standing in a courtyard waiting for Thor and Loki to disappear back to Asgard when it happens.

Steve gets a look on his face that Bucky recognises all too well and suddenly lurches forward to where the brothers are standing. He grasps at the box holding the tesseract and tries to break it on the pavement and –

Steve whispers as the thing’s light starts to be visible, Steve whispers, “Bucky. Give Bucky back his body. Please.” Over and over again. And none of the avengers are moving; all are too surprised to react.

So Bucky moves, startled and desperate to try and pull Steve back. “Steve! Steve stop! Stop, you idiot, you’ve seen what that thing does to people, stop it!”

His hands grasp at Steve, at the box, at the glow, at anything they can. He doesn’t want to live again; he wants Steve to and this won’t work.

And –

 

And –

His hands are scrabbling at Steve’s and they do not go through and he can feel Steve’s blood pumping and feel the air and feel his own breath coming in ragged gasps and, and Steve grabs him and falls away from the tesseract still panting Bucky’s name as if in prayer.


End file.
